literature

Hold, Youth

Deviation Actions

AzizrianDaoXrak's avatar
Published:
318 Views

Literature Text

You are verging on knife edges, wild youth:
The pricking of the blade in your bare steps
Marks trees of paper cuts, spells out the truth
that like lime juice keeps the wounds fresh -

You're not yet the person you'll want to be,
And that boy 'cross the room for whom you long,
Wild youth, will swallow you down like sweet tea;
You must feel your bones curled 'round, and all wrong.

Tightrope walker, do not let yourself slide -
Sense the vice-fear like spikes beneath your skin;
Use them well, cliff-walker, toughen your hide,
cling still to the walls, hide even from winds.

Hold - hold, for a boy who shall not, Grendel-
like, crush you warm and wet, small and spindle'd.
UGH, Sonnet, I HATE YOU. I'm so terrible at fixed-form poetry, but :iconlacoterie: convinced me it was time to have another go at a sonnet, so here I am.

It SHOULD have been:

:bulletblue: An ironic sonnet.
:bulletblue: Not about love.
:bulletblue: Using one of the five senses in a new and inventive way.
:bulletblue:Not mentioning any body parts.

I think generally I did pretty well. Except for all the places I didn't....SONNETS ARE HARD. I guess I tried to make a sonnet about why a young person shouldn't fall in love....? That's ironic, right...? And I think I mostly just ended up focusing on one sense (touch).

Gah, for me just getting rhyming and iambic pentameter was hard. RAWRAAWRAWR :iconspazattackplz:

Anywho...enjoy?

Critique for #lacoterie :[link]
Comments2
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
intricately-ordinary's avatar
This is fantastic! Sonnets. are hard. blaaah. I tried to do one again the other night for the first time in months, just, oi. Rhymes. This is wonderful though! With sonnets, I often find the good ones need to be read a few times to fully understand. This was no exception. Each read through I understood more, and appreciated every word you chose. Really great.